A very fat woman with a very big mouth came to the dentist and sat on the dentist's chair. 



"Open your mouth wide". 



She complied; and at the request of the dentist she opened her mouth. 



But before the dentist could  examine  her teeth, she asked him:



"Doc, you know and  I know that I have a very big mouth;  but why  do you have to rub it in by telling me twice to open my mouth? 



"No, madam, I did not tell you to open your mouth twice.  What you heard the second time is the echo from your mouth."

 

Rajaputhran.

A strange Love Letter This is a love letter, where the guy expresses his feelings to his love, purely in terms of product punch lines.... You are my TVS SCOOTY (First Love) and also my AIWA (PURE PASSION). I Always BPL (Believe in best) and you are SANSUI (Better than best). You are MC DOWEL'S (Mera number one) love LA O PALA (Made for one). I believe in FRESHIYA (Gorepan se jyade khoobsurti ka wada) and you are one of the most beautiful in this world. I think of you day and night. When you give me one and only smile I feel you are DOMINO'S PIZZA (Delivering a Million of smile per day). This is COLGATE ENERGEY GEL (Seriously Fresh) feeling for me. I would like you to be my life partner. I know you are worried about your Father who is KAWASAKI BAJAJ CALIBER (The unshakable) and also my Father who is CEAT (Born tough). But don't worry I am also FORD ICON (The Josh Machine) and rest of our family members are KELVINATOR (The coolest one). If they will say no we will run away and marry and PHILIPS (Lets make things better). They will feel MIRINDA (Jor ka jatka dhire se lage) and we are COCA COLA (Jo chahe ho Jaye Coca cola enjoy). Trust in God who's always NOKIA (Connecting people) those who love each other. And we are WILLS (Made for each Other). We will be HERO HONDA (Leading the way) of our love life. Then our life will be BOLERO (Break free). Now HUNDAI (we are listening) the song of love you must know that love is DAIRY MILK (The real taste of life), SATYAM ON LINE (Fun, fast, easy), PARX (always comfortable) and also AMUL (The real taste of India) and for me life is HOME TRADE (Life means more). So never forget me. OK bye! I wrote but PEPSI (Ye dil mange More) LG [Digitally yours] by Anon

Sardar Baldev Singh, the first Defence Minister of India, in Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru's Cabinet was noted for his stinginess. It was usual for him to wear a pair of socks for a month without washing, resulting in a bad odour emanating from him whenever he came near to one. The Prime Minister was aware of this. So, the day prior to the Russian Delegation visiting the Capital, he called Baldev to his room and said: "Baldev, tomorrow, the Russian Delegation is visiting our Capital, and as Defence Minister you will have to receive them and bring them to me for a discussion. To mark the occasion, I am giving you a new pair of socks, and please wear that new pair of socks tomorrow and do not wear your old ones." Baldev Singh, acceded to the request of his Prime Minister, and attended the party the next day, wearing the new pair of socks. After every body had departed for the night, Jawaharlal Nehru, called Baldev Singh to his room and started berating him for not complying with his request. "But Jawahar, I am wearing the new pair of socks that you gave me yesterday" Controlling his anger Jawaharlal Nehru said: " Is that so? Then how come there is a bad odour(Badbu) emanating from you?" "Ah that? I know you will not believe me. So, I put the old pair of socks, in my coat pockets and brought it to show to you?" So saying, Sardar Baldev Singh, the first Defence Minister of Independent India, took out the stinking pair of socks from his coat pockets and handed it to Jawaharlal Nehru, the first Prime Minister of Independent India and walked away, with his injured dignity in his empty coat pockets. Rajaputhran) by (Anonymous)

A Punjabi Army Jawan serving in the Borders, was on home on a short leave. His elderly parents, insisted that he should get married to their neighbour's daughter, and after a lot of hesitation, he agreed to marry her. Within three months of his four months leave, he was recalled, because there was some urgency on the borders, and his presence became essential. In the meantime his wife had become pregnant, and before he took leave of her, he instructed her that when their son is born, to send him a telegram with the following words. "Cycle Delivered Safely", because he did not want his unit to know that he is no more a bachelor. In due course, the happy event took place, but instead of a boy, a bony girl was the outcome. The proud mother hesitated only for a moment before she sent him, her husband, the following telegram: "Cycle Delivered Safely; but without Bells and Pump." Rajaputhran. by Anonymous.

A travelling salesman, a Sardarji of the turbaned kind was taking his girl friend, a good looking well shaped Punjabi Kudi for an evening walk on the banks of the river Sone. As he wanted to impress her with his accomplishments, he had snipped the pouches of the side pockets of the pants he was wearing that day. After hearing sweet nothings for some time from the lass, he suddenly said to her:"Sonia, please put your right hand into my pants pocket". She obliged him but little did she expect that her right hand would land on his bulging male member and having landed she fondled it transporting her boy friend to pleasures beyond the realm of reality. After some time they continued their jay- walk on the banks of the river Sone. This time Sonia was on the other side of her lover. The cunning Sardarji once again requested his lady-love to put her hand but in the opposite pocket. She did as she was told. To her astonishment this time also her hand landed on his bulging male member. In great eagerness she asked him: "Makiya, how come you have two male members and four 'gandes'? " "Ah, stupid woman, did I not tell you I am not the ordinary type? Imagine the pleasure that I can give you when you marry me? Your joy would be doubled." In due course they got married and during the first night when she saw him naked she saw only one male member and two gandes. When asked about this discrepancy the intelligent Sardar told her that he had lent one set to his friend, who wanted to satisfy his wife. The time came for this this travelling salesman to leave his new bride alone and conduct his business in the outlying districts. Promisng her to be back in seven days, he left on his errand. Sonia found her lonliness unbearable and after two days of suffering she remembered the friend with whom her husband had parked his "other set of male member and gandes". She approached him and asked about the loan of the male member her husband had given to him. This man another cunning Sardar understood the situation perfectly and invited her to his bed room on the pretext of showing the male member and the gandes. Since she was desperate to be laid, he laid her truely well. More than satisfied with his performance she promised to return everyday till her husband returned. She was true to her promise and this studd was more than what she had bargained for. In due course her husband returned and was desperate to ply his troth. At night when he was ready to sheath his shaft, Sonia stopped him in mid-track and said: "You Bosdi, you gave the better performing male member and gandes to your friend and kept a small puny member and even smaller gandes, which leaves me unsatisdfied. " The intelligent and cunning Sardarji was stumped for life!!! Rajaputhran. by Anonymous